Dear God/Buddha/Allah or however You wish to be addressed,
It has come to my attention that the sudden yet generous snowfall this year might be a sign, or a test sent by You to your people. If that is the case I would like to make the following statement:
Please, in all your divine mercy, opt me out.
As a person of little (if any) faith, that is not affiliated (or wishes to be) with any religion I DO NOT wish to partake in the mentioned testing process. Therefore, please do not send more snow to my home address, send it to them sinners, at least they will appreciate you more when it melts away.
In conclusion, please, get the fuck, and keep the fuck out of my yard, both front and back.
Thank You,
yours sincerely
a very angry cookiemonster
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